The 52-Week Rut Buster

In late 2009, friends Pam Godwin (left) and Karen Amster-Young (right) felt a little stuck. They wondered when they'd stopped exploring new ways to fill their soul, stomach and sense of self. With a shared feeling of restlessness, they decided to change things up.

So one night, three cocktails deep, the two fortysomethings made a pledge to try something new, fun, challenging, or ridiculous every week for a year -- and document the ups and downs along the way. The52Weeks blog was born.

Not only did the two New York women become "unstuck," they also have inspired many others to get moving, too. They have checked off many adventures from their to-do lists: rock climbing, poker lessons, makeovers, test-driving impractical sports cars. And they're not done yet. 

SecondAct caught up with Godwin and Amster-Young to discuss their plans for 2012.

SA: Why is it so important for midlifers to try new things and stay fresh?
KAY: Otherwise you stop challenging yourself and you risk feeling a bit stagnant. Trying new things opens your eyes to new opportunities and builds confidence. We were feeling restless and found ourselves wondering "What's next?" It was this feeling that inspired us to launch the52weeks.com.

SA: What were your greatest challenges in keeping the blog going for an entire year?
KAY: As most people would probably agree, scheduling time for you is always challenging. I think women in particular feel guilty when they carve out time for themselves. The blog and feeling accountable to both the project and Pam helped keep me going, but life certainly got in the way sometimes. You just have to keep trying. I don't think we originally realized just how tough it was going to be, to try something new, different or face a fear each week for 52 weeks and also write about it. But we plowed ahead and realized that it was more about the journey and not the calendar.

PG: As Karen said, finding time and wrestling with the guilt of doing something for me was a big challenge. The biggest hurdle for me, however, was the challenge of posting what I ultimately had done. Before this project began, I would have never considered myself a writer, so recording my stories and experiences was a big undertaking for me. I was very hard on myself, but I knew that being accountable in print would help keep me going and allow me to follow through with the52weeks.

SA: What are you most proud of? Are you surprised by how much the blog has grown?
KAY: When we step back and really think about it, what's interesting is that it was the act of creating and building the blog that is ultimately what got us unstuck. The blog itself became the very thing that moved us forward. I'm most proud of sticking with it despite how hard it was at times to keep it going. I was and am determined to share what we've learned with others feeling the same way. I am also proud of the fact that we are just two friends and two moms; we're not life coaches or therapists or anything else, and I think people really relate to how we felt and how real the whole journey has been and continues to be.

PG: Exactly. Very early on, things shifted and it became more about the idea that we were actually doing this blog, rather than the specifics of each week's challenge. Since everyone's challenges are different, we realized that as long as we were out there trying something, moving forward and reconnecting, we were succeeding. And when others responded to that, too, it was a pretty great feeling.

SA: What's your advice to other midlifers who might feel stuck in a rut?
KAY: Take one baby step forward. I found that if you break it down into small steps, it's more manageable. Also, trying just one new thing can get you going.

PG: Find someone to come along with you for the ride. Often, when you feel like you're stuck in a rut, you think you're the only one out there feeling that way and it can seem very lonely. If you can connect with others in any way, it can make all the difference.

SA: What's next for you in 2012? How do you plan to grow?
KG: We're excited that our personal mission is shifting outward so we can help motivate and inspire others. We are working on a book featuring experts in relationships, wellness, arts and culture, the importance of having fun and all the other things we explored for the52weeks.com. In terms of our personal journeys -- it's ongoing. There are definitely things we still haven't tried or tackled. Hopefully we'll keep checking them off in 2012.

SA: Describe your perfect day.
KAY: It's funny, this blog is all about the importance of trying new things, but at the end of the day there's something so great about doing nothing for a day. I think we're all so busy that it's easy to find that appealing sometimes. Ironically, you can only appreciate doing nothing when you've actually taken time to run around, shake it up and go beyond your comfort zone. That's why the52weeks.com was so important to me.

PG: Karen is so right. Doing nothing is great as long as you want to be doing nothing. When you're feeling stuck, you don't want to be sitting home alone in a rut. But now that I've taken time to explore and get moving again during the52weeks, I'd like to take a day to relax on the beach and only move when it's time to shift my chair toward the sun.

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